The Things I Want
by HecateA
Summary: Today is the day that James Potter has to chose which Quidditch team he's signing a contract with. Or is it? Oneshot.


**Author's Note: **Time to get _sappy. _

**Disclaimer: **The following characters belong to J.K. Rowling, and this story derives from her original works, storylines, and world. Please do not sue me, I can barely pay tuition.

**Warnings: **Allusions to parent deaths and illnesses, not canon.

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**Stacked with: **Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry (Assignment #9, Wandlore Task 5); MC4A; Shipping Wars; By Any Other Name; Snicket Fence

**Individual Challenge(s): **Gryffindor MC (x2); Seeds; Brush; In a Flash (Y); Neurodivergent

**Representation(s): **ADHD James Potter, fight me canon.

**Bonus challenge(s): **Second Verse (Not a Lamp); Bee Haven

**Word Count: **808

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**_Shipping Wars_**

**Ship (Team): **Lily Evans and James Potter (Patronus Pair)

**List (Prompt): **NA

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**The Things I Want**

Lily had to cross her ankles to keep her leg from bouncing up and down as she sat outside McGonagall's office. Even if she'd been waiting for it, she still jumped when the door finally opened. The three Quidditch coaches came out along with Madam Hooch (paler than Lily had ever seen her), McGonagall (unreadable as usual), and finally James (still wearing his Quidditch robes from the game and looking quite dashing in them too). He nodded politely and shook all the hands that were offered to him before Madam Hooch escorted them out. He was oddly calm and oddly still and Lily wasn't sure what it meant.

"Miss Evans?" McGonagall asked. "Were you waiting to see me? I do hope you don't need career advice from me at this point of your seventh year…"

"No, professor," Lily asked. She finally made eye contact with James who smiled at her and reached out for her, pulled her closer, and kissed her hair boldly right in front of McGonagall. She cleared her throat.

"I do hope you're proud of your decision, Mr. Potter," she said.

Lily could burst.

"I am, professor. Thank you for your help."

"You're a good man, James Potter," McGonagall said before shutting the door. As soon as Lily heard the _click _of its lock, she cracked.

"And? How did it go?" Lily asked excitedly.

"Well," James said. He threw his arm around her and steered her towards the hallway that would bring them to the Common Room.

"What does 'well' mean?" Lily said. "Did you go Wasps or Falcons?"

James had been evasive over the last few weeks when Lily had tried to talk to him about the offers that were trickling in, or the processes by which he and McGonagall and Hooch were narrowing down his list of options. Uncharacteristic as it was of James to avoid talking about Quidditch with her when it was explicitly offered to him, Lily hadn't worried about it too much. She'd assumed that he was already going over these things with Remus and Sirius and Peter, probably at night in the dormitory while they ate cookie dough and braided each other's hair. But now she worried.

"James?" she said. He looked at her with a frown and she pulled him out of the hallway and into a courtyard, where she sat him down on a bench and leveled with him.

"What aren't you telling me?" Lily asked. "Wasps or Falcons? I need to know what colours to invest in for my boyfriend's first professional Quidditch game…"

"I turned both offers down," James told her.

Her jaw dropped.

"Excuse me?" she said.

"I mean, if I can't play for the Holyhead Harpies, what's really the point of any professional—"

"James, not now with the Harpies jokes. What do you mean you turned both offers down?" Lily said. "Those were contracts…. To play Quidditch… Professionally…"

Saying the words out loud felt totally wrong to Lily. Absolutely disorienting.

"Yeah, Hooch was just as stunned and convinced I'd misunderstood," James grimaced.

Lily sat on his lap gently, lacing one of her arms behind his neck.

"And?" Lily asked. He put a hand on her hip, holding her securely.

"They were too far away," James said quietly. "Falmouth and Wimbourne are both so far away from home, and with mum being unwell…"

"Oh, James…"

"Listen, if last summer taught us anything, it's that time is limited and you only get one set of parents," James said quietly. He reached for his wrist, where he rubbed the band of his father's watch. "And if that wasn't enough, with the amount of attacks against Muggle-borns that have been going on…"

"James, no," Lily said. "Don't make this about me."

"I'm not _making _this about you Evans, everything _is _about you for me," he said. "You should know that by now. I couldn't imagine being away from my mother, I couldn't imagine maybe being away from you, and I couldn't imagine throwing a ball around while people are dying and there are so many bigger things to do… We were negotiating, but they were so strict on the living arrangements and time off that new recruits get, and I just… it wasn't worth it. It wasn't worth missing out on my family for."

"James…"

"Stop, Evans," James said. "I'm not sad."

"I've never known you to want anything other than play Quidditch," Lily said quietly. "What if you regret this?"

"I want lots of things," James said, resting his head on her shoulder. "Things I want more of. Things that are bigger than this. As far as sacrifices go, I think this is a rather small one that I'll come out on top of."

"I'll make sure of it," Lily said, running her hand up into his hair and pulling him in for a kiss.


End file.
